You have been caring for a loved one (LO) for a day, week ,month or more than a year and you are unsure how you got into this spot and how long will it last. When your LO became ill and needed care, many individuals offered to help but as time progresses, they return to their lives and you are now the caregiver fulltime. You love this person, that is not the issue but you also need a caregiver for yourself.

Being a caregiver can be both rewarding and yet challenging at the same time. Once Rick and I moved to the phase of long-term adjustments, my role became that as a Care Partner.

Rick’s stroke affected his taste and the ability to determine when he was hungry or thirsty. Everything tasted bad and he would go hours without eating or drinking unless I reminded him. This remains an ongoing and frustrating issue for both of us. I make a nutritious meal and he would take one or two bites and be done. I tried every recommended diet on the market with no luck.

One morning, he got out of bed a little too fast and felt dizzy. This is not uncommon; we’ve all done this, but with a stroke survivor, this is a concern. Before I could slow him down, he lost his balance and fell to the floor. He gathered himself and refused to call the MD. Although he wasn’t injured, I was concerned. Later that day, he again lost his balance and felt woozy.

Many things have changed over the last few years. So many activities I took for granted on a daily basis now need additional help to accomplish. Prior to the stroke, I could count on Rick for house repairs, being my partner on outings, talking over the days events and traveling. Life still continues and we still can enjoy many activities but it is different and need to planned or initiated by me.

Big News! Stroke and the Spouse is written and currently being prepared for publishing. Please check out a sample from Chapter One.

Did you wake this morning thinking what does the day have planned for me? Medication given, food made, Blood pressure checked and planning the days activities. But what about you?

After eighteen months of attending so many medical appointments with Rick, I had my medical checkup. As I sat with my doctor, I realized how my health was impacted and neglected. Stress has a negative impact on your health, and I am living proof.

The last year and a half have been challenging but also a time of growth. The pain, sadness and loss were all around me and yet God provided an outlet for me, my upcoming book, and this website. Like me, a caregiver, your life changes daily and you need to adapt. Being able to adapt is the key to survival but I no longer want to only survive but to be able to find joy in our new life together.

I have not posted in a few weeks due to a death in the family. Rick’s Mom passed away at the age of 92. A wonderful and peaceful death. Being a caregiver to her and being with her as she was transitioning from life was an honor and an opportunity to resolve issues in the relationship. It is so important to have no regrets as to words unsaid or actions undone.

I love to entertain and have a house full of guest. Rick and I would start planning early. He would decorate the outside and I would do the inside. Like all couples, I did the shopping but we would joke, he was mt last minute man. I could always count on him to run to the store numerous times to get that one ingredient that I forgot. He would laugh and never complain.

I have been the spouse of a stroke survivor for about two years. On the day that Rick had a stroke, I could not see past the crisis. I was angry, sad and frightened. My world was falling apart and I had no idea what to do. As a nurse, I knew all the medical aspects and that really helped to navigate the medical care and decisions that need to be made but it did not prepare me for the emotional aspect of being the spouse.

Your head is spinning, and you are unsure what is next. I have been that spouse in the waiting room chair looking around the room thinking “How the heck did I end up here?” Unsure of what is happening to your loved one and what if any future you will have together.